Sacrifices of the heart
by markie1990
Summary: You all know the story Hermione told about removing her parents memory's but what didn't she want Ron to know, what secret did she have to hind in her life outside Hogwarts?


**At the moment this story is without a beta so the spelling and grammar may be poor, it will be updated once i find a beta. Also, this the my first attempt at posting one of my stories so it may not be up to standard. please feel free to review but please no flamers**

Hermione pov;

This was it, it was time.

I have been standing in my bedroom for hours looking at all the things I am going to miss, it took me much longer than it should have to pack; I guess I really don't want to leave, more to the point I really don't want to do what I have to do before I _can _leave.

The order, Ron and I, were about to go get Harry from his aunt and uncles and take him to the burrow.

It had all been in place for weeks, we were going to create 6 other Harry Potters so if we were attacked the enemy wouldn't know which harry was the real one.

I told mad eye Harry wasn't going to take it well but he insisted it was the only way, so I volunteered to be a decoy.

Ron was against it through and through; he didn't want me to take any unnecessary spell fire, mind you _he _is set to be a decoy.

That's just like Ron; trying to prevent me from doing something he would do in a heart beat.

Still, I couldn't help but be a little touched; I guess in his own way he was trying to protect me, it finally took me screaming at him that I can look after myself for him to agree.

The look on his face was heart breaking, he can be so sweet; always putting himself in danger to get me out of it and yet he goes about it in such the wrong ways.

I wish he would just tell me he loves me and doesn't want to lose me, then I could tell him how much I love him and we can stop pretending not to.

I had to yell at the man I love to stop trying to protect me when all I wanted to do was kiss him and tell him not to worry, that as long as we are together I will always be ok.

But I can't do that, because I have a problem.

How can I tell him I love him considering my secret?

I had to focus on the problem at hand; it was time to leave, well almost time…..I had two things left to do, the two hardest things I will ever have to do in my life;

I love my parents with all my hart and I would never forget them, but they had to forget me I didn't know if I was going to be able to do it when the time came.

I had a little time, because he was on his way and this may be even harder.

Before I took my parents memories of me away from them, I had to remove myself from the mind of the only other man I will ever love.

Alex's pov;

I was on my way to her.

Hermione was home and had finally called after weeks of waiting, wondering why she hadn't called yet.

A couple of years ago she had finally told me the truth about herself, it had taken a long time to get it out of her.

She is a witch, I believed her as soon as she told me.

'I knew you were special….' I had whispered to her after the feather she had made float drifted back to her bed

'….because from the moment I saw you I loved you, what else could that have been but magic?'

She didn't say anything, she just smiled.

I wiped the tear from her cheek and then we had the most perfect first kiss in the history of first kisses; I'm not sure if it was my imagination or the wand she was still holding but the candle lit room was suddenly full of sparkling lights at the tough of our lips.

I knew in that second I was going to marry this girl, I have never loved someone in my life.

That's why when she told me on the phone that she was home and wanted to see me on the weekend my heart inflated, but at the sound of her voice I knew something was wrong.

I decided to do the thing I wanted to do from the night she snuck me into her room after her parents were asleep to show me who she was.

I had to steal the ring from my mother; she wouldn't miss it, she had so many diamond rings from her marriages to wealthy men she couldn't keep track and she didn't care what I did or where I went so I didn't feel the need to ask.

I was so nervous walking to her place, I knew she loved me but what if there was someone else?

That can't be the problem; we have been seeing each other for years and we had known each other ever since her family moved into the house down the street when I was ten.

When she turned eleven she started to go away to school so we had to stop seeing each other every day but whenever she came back it was like a dream I was afraid to wake from.

She loved me as much as I loved her and I was sure she would say yes but it was still a lot to ask; I'm nineteen and my mother wouldn't care if I disappeared for ever but she is only seventeen and her parents loved her so much, they even treat me like a son but I don't know if they will approve.

I will do anything they want of me; I will get a better job or go to college but I had to be with her, there was no other way for me.

She is my everything and I can't live without her.

Hermione's pov;

Alex would be here any minute.

I began to pace, I can't do this, I cant.

What am I going to tell him? Should I tell him anything?

Oh god, no.

The doorbell rang and I heard my mother call to my farther to answer it.

"Get a hold of yourself Hermione, you can do this, you have to" I told myself over and over, it helped a little until I heard his voice as my farther answered the door; my heart woke at the sound of it, like it had been asleep all year and was now trying to beat its way out of my chest to get to him.

I stood in my room, staring at the back of the door, my arms held limp at my sides.

I was never going to be able to do this, I loved him so much.

He knocked, I jumped a little but I don't know why; I composed myself quickly and slowly reached for the door handle, I turned it and there he stood.

I had forgotten how handsome he is, he was wearing what he would have thought was nice clothes; dark blue jeans with rips in them and a dark red button up shirt which was to small on him.

He always hated that he didn't have the money to look nice for me – his mother had more important things to buy for herself to care much what her only son was wearing, the bitch – but I never cared about things like that, in fact I liked that his clothes were too tight at times; it showed of the muscles he had built from various sport teams at school and his job as a truck loader for our local furniture store.

His hair was black and shoulder length which bought out his deep blue eyes, every girl in town wanted him and couldn't understand why he was holding out for that wiry haired nerd at the end of the street.

I had wondered that myself at times but at those times I just told myself to be happy he wanted me, no matter the reason.

What confused me was why he put himself down so much, didn't he see why he was so amazing?

He was gorgeous, funny, smart and he had the kindest heart of anyone I had ever met.

I loved him with all my heart, how could I let him go?

I realized I was just standing there staring at him, he must have thought I was a freak.

"Hey Alex" I said as if I were that little girl again who had a silly little crush on the boy down the street.

"Hey Hermione" he almost whispered as if he were afraid he had stumbled into a dream.

I stepped forward and reached up to put my arms around his neck so I could hug him, he was about 6'3 so he had to lift me a little, which I liked.

The hug lasted longer than it should have, like neither of us wanted to let go, but I had to.

I let go of him and took his hand to lead him into my room.

He shut the door behind himself and I immediately pushed him against it and began kissing him as if I would die without him.

I parted my lips and felt his tongue enter my mouth, I rubbed it with mine.

The kiss was slow and passionate, every second I wanted it more; his hands were on my back, he had to lift me a little or I knew they would be exploring my skin and I wanted that.

I broke the kiss and pulled him to the bed; he was on top of me, one of his legs between mine and I had one of mine wrapped around his.

The kiss was just as passionate but was picking up speed, I knew what I had to do but I never wanted to let go of him.

I had made up my mind, if I could never have him again then I was going to have him one last time, for as long as I could.

Alex's pov;

The door opened and there she was, as beautiful as ever.

She didn't think she was special but she was to me, she was wearing black pants and a low cut, long sleave blue top.

Her hair was straight; she only did that for very special occasions, she said I was too much work to do every day.

Seeing her made my world brighter; her brown eyes, her ruby lips, the way she brushed her hair behind her ear even though there was none in her face.

The rest of the world fell away, all that was left was me and her yet somehow everything around her was brighter.

She was staring at me, I was happy to let her because it meant I could stare right back but she spoke and the 'spell' was broken.

"Hey Alex" was all she said but her voice sang a sympathy to my heart, although I was in rages she made me feel like a king.

"Hey Hermione" I said back weakly but she didn't care if I sounded weak, she just hugged me.

I had never been happier then I had in that moment, I squeezed her tight and she just squeezed back.

She led me into her room and after I closed the door she pushed me against it and kissed me.

The moment her soft lips touched mine I was sure I had died on my way to her house and this must be the bliss we are promised.

Her tongue massaged mine as the world fell away aging, I never wanted to stop but it did.

She broke away the pulled me to her bed, on top of her.

Her leg wrapped around mine and she began to lift up my shirt.

"Slow down Hermione…." I said with a smile, stopping her from taking of my shirt.

"….we have all night. Besides, before we do this I-uh- I have something I want to ask you"

I made to get up but I was stopped by something that terrified me, tears running down her cheek.

I froze what had I done.

"Hermione, what's wrong?" I asked with fear

"Alex….please" she said and tugged at my shirt again

I didn't know what was going on but I would have to wait, she wanted me now for whatever reason and I would not let her down.

I tucked the ring back in my pocket, for now.

Hermione pov;

An hour later we were lying under the blanket, our cloths long since discarded.

I was lying across his muscular chest not looking at him; I knew he was looking at me, his hand was brushing my hair as if he was going to be able to smooth it out again.

I had used the spell Harry had learned from the half-blood prince on the door so no one out could hear anything, it had been a wise chose as my parents would have thought I were being murdered if they heard us; somehow knowing this was never going to happen again made me appreciate every second more intensely then I ever had before.

My body was numb – in a very good way – but I wasn't happy, I had no other excuses to make.

I traced my fingers along every grove of his abbs over and over again; I was trying to take note of every touch, every line, every drop of sweat on his body, the feel of his fingers in my hair, his smell, his warmth.

"Are you alright, my love?" he asked me, I remembered to note the sound of his voice.

"No" I whispered back, his hand stopped moving

"Please don't stop" I begged in the same whisper

He must have felt a tear fall on his body because he sat me up and took my face in his hands, he made me look into his eyes so more tears fell

"Whatever it is, we can get through it together" he promised me. For a second I believed him, for a second I decided to stay, to have children with him, to grow old and die in each other's arms.

"My love?"

"No, Alex, you can't do this with me" I cried, tears gushed down my face.

"I have to leave you"

His eyes filled with tears as he let go of my face

"Why?" he whispered through his anguish

"I don't have a choice" I told him the truth, everything that had happened and everything that still had to happen.

When I was done the sheets were soaked, we were both shattered.

We might not be old but we were dying in each other's arms.

We stared into each other's eyes without saying a word for a while.

"Will you come back?" he asked me with a broken voice

"I hope so"

"But you don't know" he said, it was a statement; he was smart and understood what was at stake.

"So what's going to happen now?" he asked, we had stopped crying but he looked as broken as I felt

My tears began again; this was it, the end.

It was my turn to take his face in my hands; I looked him deep in his beautiful blue eyes and said

"Now you are going to go to sleep….and when you wake up….ill just be a nice dream you had once upon a time"

His tears fell too

"I don't think this is going to work" he told me

"Why?" I asked as I reached for my wand

"Because the moment I meet you I fell under your spell, I don't think you have enough magic to make me forget how much I love you"

I kissed him one last time, a long, passionate kiss; like the first time I kissed him and felt my love flow though my wand.

"I hope your right" I said and I got up and pointed my wand at him

"I will always love you, Herm-"

He was cut off by my spell; I fell to my knees and bawled my eyes out, as he fell back into the sleep that will take me away from him.

After twenty minutes of crying I got up and put on my cloths, I picked up his pants to put them on the bed next to him but was taken aback when something fell out of the pocket.

I bent down and picked up the little silver ring with a big diamond on it, he was going to ask me to marry him?

I looked over at him as he slept, that sweet, beautiful man.

I walked over to him and gently kissed him on the lips, I knew he couldn't hear me but I landed in and whispered in his ear

"I would have said yes" and turned to leave the room.

I stopped at the door and slid the ring on my right hand before I remembered the room, I turned and cast my spells and one more on Alex before I left the room and cast my spells on my parents, then I left the house and the people I loved.

I didn't look back, I couldn't; but I swore I would return to them.

Alex's pov;

I woke felling very strange, what had I been dreaming?

I had a feeling it was about a girl, I very beautiful girl but I couldn't remember.

I looked around the room, it felt odd too, what kind of dream what that?

I got up and got dressed, still trying hard to remember before I opened the door and walked out.

I walked into the living room

"Morning, Alex, did you sleep well?"

"Not really, I had a strange dream. I feel off too, like…a piece of me in missing."

"What like a broken heart?"

"I don't know, I just feel like I'm meant to be in love or something"

"Of course you're meant to be in love, you're such a handsome, good man; you just have to find the right girl"

"Thanks, mum." I said before I sat down between my parents

"She would have said yes"

"What's that?" my dad asked

"Oh it's nothing, just something I heard in my dream. I don't know why but those words made me very happy….and very sad at the same time."


End file.
